Seasons of Love from RENT is one of the songs on my running playlist. It is one that sits in the early middle of the list when I am not too tired but not totally into the run yet either. It's not a fast song, I know but it is good for me on most days. It reminds me that it isn't easy to measure a year, a life, a journey. It is a song that grounds me every day that I run. I was listening to it today and realized that it has been almost exactly a year since I decided to start my running journey and to start being public about it with this blog. I thought it was a great time to reflect. How do I measure this year in terms of my goal to become a runner?
No, I still do not consider myself a runner. It is not an identity I have --I consider myself a mom, a teacher, a reader, a wife, a daughter, but not a runner yet. But I do think to myself that I run. I am getting closer to considering myself a runner.
As I move into my 2nd year of this goal of becoming a runner. I find myself catching up from 1-2 months of not really running. Once August hit, I became less committed to my goal and got caught up in work and school and stuff. And then when NCTE time came around, I took more of a break, then got a 2 week sinus infection and then felt crummy. So I went almost 4-5 weeks with no running at all.
And this week, I started again. I started the C25K program using my iPhone and the first week consisted of running 45 seconds, walking 90 seconds, running 45 seconds, walking 60 seconds. I decided to just go with the full 8 week program instead of figuring out what else to do. It wasn't too easy but I did add a few 2 minute runs. I figure I'll know in a week or two if this program is the right match and I can revise then.
Last year, I started with a 16 week program. Day one was running 30 seconds, walking 2 minutes for 20 minutes and it was not easy.So, I have definitely made progress. But I have realized over the year that is about more than the minutes run or the time run. I've learned a lot more.
1-I learned that consistency matters but taking a break doesn't necessarily mean quitting. There are times in life that we are busy and that we can't follow the schedule we've set out. I have been a reader my entire life and there are weeks and months that I can't fit a book in for one reason or another. But I don't consider myself a non-reader during those months and I never worry that I won't get back to reading. I've realized this about fitness. Every other time I've started something and had to take a break due to illness or some life thing, I feel like I've quit. This time, I didn't ever let myself feel that way. I realized that I would just have to work hard after my break to get back to where I was. This is a huge aha for me.
2-People matter. Because of this running thing, I have gotten to know some amazing people. I am thankful for blogs like
365 Days of Awesome and
Another Mother Runner that first let me think, "Hey, I could do this." These blogs helped me realize that running and fitness don't fit neatly into anyone's life. It takes effort and commitment for anyone who runs. There is something so amazing about people willing to put their stories out there for others. Somehow someone's story helps someone else.
3-And then there are the
#runteacherrun peeps who never let me down. There are so many people who take the time to share their journeys and to be cheerleaders for others on similar journeys. The online community has been an amazing support and it is fun to talk both running and books with so many great people.
4-Books like
Running for Mortals,
Run Like A Mother/T
rain Like a Mother and
Sole Sisters were hugely important to me. I need to read stories of runners often and these books gave me lots of aha moments.
5-I learned a bit about balance. Even though I ended up sick and ended the year with low energy, I spent most of the year feeling better than I have in years. I had more energy and more fun and I just felt better. I realized (even though I knew it) that I am a better mother, wife, teacher, daughter, sister and friend when I am exercising. There is always something to do and I am always on a quest to get "caught up". But this year I realized that 30-60 minutes of exercise 5-6 days a week did not change the length of my to-do list.
6-My reading life stressed me out a bit this year. I only read 160ish books this year, compared to 300+ in 2011. It took me a while to be okay with that number. Part of the reason for this is that I am in the classroom instead of in the library this year. The other part was that I was a little more active. I'd still like to read a bit more than I did this year but I am happy with the balance I have. I am still amazed at all the people I know who work hard, are great parents, run daily, read 1500 books a year and more. I am not sure how they do it all but I am getting better at balance and that has been a goal for me for a decade or more.
7-Work continues to be my problem. I love my work and I fall back on working too much often throughout the year. Sometimes I just get energized by the work so I let other things go. Other times I over commit and then have to follow through. I am working on this and consistent exercise has helped.I think the fact that I had a running goal all year helped. I was working toward something outside of my job--something that had a goal. The goal matters, I think.
8-Even though I don't quite consider myself a runner, I do feel part of the running community. After Hurricane Sandy, when the news was covering the NY Marathon and whether they would hold it or not, I had opinions. I understood the issues around the cancellation and also understood what this meant for the people who I knew who had worked to run this marathon. I was talking to my brother about it one day and he said, "Why do you even care if they cancel it or not?" I said, "Because these are my friends. I am part of the running community.". We both laughed but I do feel much more part of this community than I ever thought possible.
9-This blog mattered. I never assumed anyone would read it and I appreciate all of those who do. I can't tell you how important this blog was to my progress. The process of reflecting and tracking my journey was important. I couldn't ignore the progress I was making or the support I was getting along the way. I know writing and goal-setting matters but this mattered a lot throughout the year. Rereading the year's blog posts helped me to realize how important it was.
10-I learned that sometimes you have to learn things for yourself. None of the things I learned are earthshaking or new. Lots of people have told me these things over and over. But learning them myself helped me to understand them. To internalize them. To believe them and to live with that understanding.
So, I go into 2013 with the same goal but with a better understanding of what I am trying to accomplish. I have a support group that I didn't have a year ago and I can look back and see what worked and what didn't. I came to know myself better and I actually now believe I can do this if I really want to. Again, I am going to commit to 3-4 days of running each week with 2ish days of yoga each week. The yoga is important I think--it helps me with all things I need to run and it gives me the strength and balance work I need. Plus it is a good way to stay balanced and strong.
So, 8 weeks of C25K and some yoga. I have registered for a Yoga workshop so that I can back up and learn the things I don't really get about yoga. A basic workshop helping me to understand what it is that I am working toward seems important now. I think it will help me get better and enjoy yoga more. I also plan to register for a 5K in March. There is a Pi Day 5K that I think fits right in with the #runteacherrun idea. What better thing to run for than math education, right? I am thinking I need to do more 5Ks just for fun. The 2 I did were a "big deal" to me and they shouldn't be. If I can get used to doing more, that might help this year.
2012 started with this
Nerdy Book Club post about my desire to be part of the running community. This past year gave me a better understanding of what it means to be a runner. I've met so many great people who have invited me into this running community. I think what I realized is that the goal to become a runner is not a 1 year goal and it can't be easily measured. Instead, it is a long-term goal and I am ready to begin year 2.